


The Legend of Plant Boi

by orphan_account



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crack, M/M, No Smut, Short, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-23
Updated: 2016-07-23
Packaged: 2018-07-26 06:35:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7563991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex is drunk and insists on bringing a plant to bed. John attempts to talk some sense into him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Legend of Plant Boi

**Author's Note:**

> This was almost smut and then I decided it would do better as a short crack fic. Hope you enjoy!

John loves the way Alexander squirms under his attention, his cheeks flushed and eyes dark. They've spent the night at the bar, and they've had several drinks too many. He smirks against his boyfriends's skin as he mouths his way down his neck, sucking and biting as he goes. Alex releases delicious little whimpers when John grabs his ass and grinds his hips against his own. Before Alex can respond, John is rolling the younger man's earlobes between his teeth and whispering hotly in his ear.  
"Fuck, you got any idea what I want to do to you right now, Baby Girl?" John hisses, smirking against his boyfriends skin. "Look at you, so good for me, so perfect. God, I-"  
John stops abruptly as Alex slips down and away from him, ducking as he rushes to the corner of the room. "What are you doing? Is something wrong?"  
Alex slumps and pouts before letting out an anguished cry. "God, John, you're so inconsiderate!" He studies John's puzzled expression and resumes, "Our plant," He points to the potted shoot of bamboo in the corner. "Feels completely left out! We can't just make him watch and not invite him to join us!"  
John can't help himself. He bursts into laughter and throws an arm around Alex, who looks offended. "C'mere, Babygirl," he tilts up Alex's chin and presses a chaste kiss to his lips. "You do realize that plants don't have feeling, don't you?" Alex shrugs and keeps his pout firmly on his face, tenderly cradling the potted plant in his arms.  
"You don't know that, John."  


John chuckles again and pulls Alex to sit on his lap. He slowly rolls his hips and sighs, "I do. And-" He pecks Alex on the cheek to hear him giggle. "I also know you'd rather be doing other things. Like, for instance, me." John punctuates his sentence with a shallow thrust of his hips, and Alex moans. Soon, the plant is forgotten.

John groans as he wakes up. Alex sits above him, eyes wide and cheeks red. "What the hell are you-" John winces as Alexander begins to sprinkle dirt onto his face. And, held affectionately in his arms, is their potted plant. John rolls over and presses his face into the pillow. "Alexander?"

"Yeah?"

"Fuck off."


End file.
